40 Clean Dad Jokes for Kids That Are Actually Funny

Calling all dads and kids who love to roll their eyes at the silliest puns! Here’s a bunch of clean dad jokes that are actually funny enough to make your little ones giggle. Whether you’re on a road trip or killing time before dinner, these jokes will keep the mood light and fun.

  1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  2. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
  3. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
  4. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  5. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
  6. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
  7. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
  8. I would tell you a construction joke, but I’m still working on it.
  9. How does a cucumber become a pickle? It goes through a jarring experience.
  10. I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.
  11. Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
  12. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
  13. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
  14. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she’ll let it go.
  15. Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.
  16. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
  17. What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.
  18. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
  19. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
  20. I told a joke about a roof. Never mind, it’s over your head.
  21. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
  22. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
  23. Why was the stadium so cool? It was filled with fans.
  24. Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
  25. What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.
  26. Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
  27. Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it.
  28. How do cows stay up to date? They read the moos-paper.
  29. Why was the math lecture so long? The professor kept going off on a tangent.
  30. Want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind, it’s tearable.
  31. Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing.
  32. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
  33. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two tired.
  34. What do you call an alligator detective? An investi-gator.
  35. Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It felt crummy.
  36. How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
  37. What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
  38. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
  39. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
  40. Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? He made a mint.

Hope these dad jokes made you and the kids smile. Share them around and keep the groan-worthy goodness going!